Sunday, April 7, 2013

Carl's Creatures pt.3 - Temple Toad Temon

This is your garden variety six legged toad demon bred by were-toad cultists in the mutating energy of the Huwawa complex.  It is large enough to swallow a man whole or carry two riders if specially constructed saddles are used.

pen and ink by moi

I am going to try statting up one of my 4e creatures in a more old school D&D style here:

Temple Toad Demon

MV: 12 (15' vertical 40' broad jump)
AC: 3 (blessed weapons do normal damage; holy water deals 1d8; 1/2 damage magical weapons, fire and acid; immune to normal weapons, cold, charm, sleep, paralysis, lightning)
MR: 50%
THAC0: 9 (or as a 14 HD creature)
Attacks:  Kick 2d12 (can kick two targets simultaneously if both are behind the toad); Bite 2d12+10 (swallows man sized or smaller targets whole on 25+ dmg - swallowed victims take 4d6+10 acid damage each round, can only use small weapons and do 1/2 normal damage to the toad); Tongue (range 35') +4 to hit; target is pulled to the toad which makes a free bite attack at +5 damage)

Temple Toad Demons are partially obscured by thick noxious fumes which constantly spill from popping blisters and warts on the toad demon's skin.  Unless holding their breath, attackers in melee range suffer -2 to hit and damage.  At the end of any round that these fumes are breathed a save vs poison must be made or the victim is dazed for 1d4 rounds and cannot take any actions beyond falling to her knees (and retching if a Constitution check is failed).

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh

I am purchasing a Cthulhu mug as a reward to myself for sticking through a rough first year laboring for a new company and getting a work from home position that should both be more lucrative and allow me more time to geek out on D&D.  Cheers!
I already own a raven mug made by Ziggy which is among my most cherished positions, being capable of imbuing stout beers with magical properties (I have proven this on many occasions through a rigorous and very scientific method).
Raven Mug
I can hardly wait to get my paws on the Cthulhu mug.  My only question is what sacrificial victim shall provide the blood for my first offering?

As a side note, a really cool campaign idea could be lifted from my conversation with Ziggy's shipping clerk:

"...surreal cabalistic magic, swashbuckling Gypsies and noblemen, overly principled merchants, and incestuous Moorish lesbians, all intricately wrapped up in stories within stories..."

For a frame of reference, my conversation with Ziggy's shipping clerk wherein I "haggle" for a $5 increase in price:

  • Kevin Runey

    Hey Carl, here is a second Cthulhu mug which is actually larger and studlier than the one that we put on Etsy, and just as fine in general quality. (Ziggy just snapped this picture with her iPad.) If you like, we could just sell this one to you locally (without the shipping charge) and let someone further afield order the one that's already posted. If you want, I could take some higher-res pictures and email them to you, or show it to you in person downtown or somewhere.
  • Carl Nash

    I want! I want! I will take not a penny less than $35 for this larger and studlier version. What is more convenient - a home invasion or a Kiva pickup?
  • Kevin Runey

    I suppose whichever is more convenient for you. And we do like your style of haggling—how can we resist? Something like that shows up in The Saragossa Manuscript. Ever see that one? It's a very trippy black-and-white film, set in Napoleonic Spain, based on a contemporaneous Polish novel, with dialogue in Polish and English subtitles available. Supposedly it was one of Jerry Garcia's favorite movies. Hey, with surreal cabalistic magic, swashbuckling Gypsies and noblemen, overly principled merchants, and incestuous Moorish lesbians, all intricately wrapped up in stories within stories, how can you lose?

Check out Ziggy's Etsy store, she is awesome and her creations are magical.

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